MOUNT WASHINGTON — Hoping to avoid “looking cliche,” 79 guys lingering near the Grandview Overlook on Mt. Washington with their girlfriend reportedly plan to continue doing so until somebody else proposes first.
“I just don’t want to go first,” said 29-year-old Clinton Hudson. “Then what if you find out your ace in the hole is the same thing the other 78 guys here had already thought of? I’d die of embarrassment. I’ll gladly go anywhere between second and 50th, but I’d hate having to think up something special after four dozen proposals, especially after I put a ton of time into picking a really unique location.”
33-year-old Dylan Moore described his hesitation as a “necessary precaution,” given the volume of suitors in the area.
“Clearly I put a little more thought into my plan than these other clowns,” he said. “Hence why me and the lady were seated at Monterrey Bay well before 18 of the 21 other couples I also see wandering around here now. It’s bad enough these losers tried to hijack my clever idea to do it on Valentine’s Day, so the last thing I want is to pop the question first and have somebody steal my ‘the best view is right in front me’ line.”
“I really scoured Google for that, and I’ll be damned if they’ll take it from me,” he added.
As of press time, one boyfriend of the 53 who brought ticket stubs as a memento of the couple’s first major event together was reportedly panicking after realizing they were for a Pirates game.
