ERIE — Erie County’s move to the yellow stage of the Governor’s reopening plan has inspired local resident Rick Morris to seek out all the activities and opportunities that don’t exist in his hometown, sources figuring they’ll have this “wrapped up soon” confirm.
“Well, it’s May, 40 degrees and rainy,” Morris said, citing his three laps around Wegmans as the “most exhilarating” part of his day so far. “That crosses off sitting on the beach, walking along the lake, and it’s like another month until any of those food truck rallies really get going. I guess I could order takeout from Sara’s and just stare at Presque Isle with the Ford’s heater on blast until it gives out — again.”
“Actually,” he added, “did I even take the snow tires off that thing yet? That’s something to get pumped about at least, right?”
Morris fruitlessly considered other events he could look forward to.
“Roar on the Shore is canceled and still wouldn’t be for two months, anyway,” he said, shaking his head. “Maybe I could relive my 20s and see if they’ll let me into the Plymouth to drink until I can’t stand straight — also again.”
As of press time, Morris was reportedly considering whether to go back to bed or, if possible, move.
