NORTH PARK — Local “running machine” Tim Liebermann determined the pace of his morning jog around the lake at North Park was far too quick to consider wearing a mask as he struggled through packs of also unmasked walkers, according to sources asking if anybody had some spare water between labored, saliva-spewing breaths.
“Everybody knows the virus doesn’t do well outdoors, especially when you’re cruising like I was,” said Liebermann, exhaling deeply as he passed by a family of four to get back to his car. “Most of the 50 or 60 people I passed seemed to understand that. Some folks glared, particularly when I had that coughing fit, and it’s like, if you’re intimidated by a superior athlete, then maybe get out of the way. Rude not to, honestly.”
As of press time, Liebermann had reportedly stopped at the bicycle bar for a drink, but declined to wear a mask because the 73 minutes of exercise “clearly” made his immune system far too powerful to give or get a virus.
